15 January 2014

Review of Baby2.0

Our beloved Baby1.0 has been upgraded to a Toddler1.0 (with added walking and talking functionality) so last year we decided to order a new model of Baby to fill the gap. We've had Baby2.0 for about 3 weeks now and I thought I'd share our experiences and views on the new model so far. I hope this review is helpful for those of you considering getting a new Baby.

Power settings

Baby2.0 has 4 power settings. Sleep, awake, awake screaming  and awake feeding. However, in order to activate sleep mode the user must hold Baby2.0 and do squats or what is known as 'the chicken walk'. This is good for our thighs but ultimately impractical for day to day living. We enjoy the 'awake' setting but would be better when we can download some new expressions, such as smiling or laughing. Current expressions limited to 'slightly perturbed' and 'bored'.

Fuel

Feeding Baby2.0 is much easier than the original model but could still be improved. While Baby1.0 needed feeding 2 different types of milk with alarming frequency, 2.0 runs on breastmilk alone. While we welcome this development, we would suggest manufacturers think about changing feeding frequency from 12 times a day to perhaps 3 or 4 for user convenience. 

Mess

Another improvement on the original is that this model only appears to need to explode with yellow emulsion paint once or twice a day compared with the original Baby's 12 times. Suggestions for next upgrade: make one that doesn't explode at all? Or change expulsions to a less stainy colour, perhaps beige or white?

Night time

Happily, Baby2.0 spends the majority of night time hours feeding or sleeping. However, there have been occasional blips where the 'scream and pinch' mode has been activated for an hour or so around 2am. We are not impressed by this function at all and don't know how to disable it.


Audio output

As Baby2.0 is considerably larger than previous model he has been fitted with much louder speakers. We are yet to find the mute button. Any help with this would be appreciated. 

Cost efficiency

Baby2.0 is dressed entirely in handmedowns and (so far) doesn't vomit all over his clothes so is saving us on washing too. Combined with lack of bottles or formula milk and fewer dirty nappies, he is proving much cheaper to run than the original. 

User-friendliness

Baby2.0 is much more user friendly than the old model but we are still flummoxed as to why he doesn't come with any sort of manual or even a helpline to call. 

Bonus features


Fitness App: A very loud alarm alerts users that they have entered a building or sat down. The alarm stops only when you return Baby2.0 to the desired state of chicken walking and being outside. We can only assume this is some sort of inbuilt fitness app to help new parents lose weight. 

Sprinkler system: Every single time you remove Baby2.0's nappy, the sensor activates a sprinkler system to alert users to the lack of nappy. Would prefer an audio alarm myself. 

Claws: I can only assume that the lethal scratching claws on this model are for self defence. No matter how short his nails are, Baby2.0 can claw chunks out of any accessible body part. I don't like this feature at all, but am pleased that, unlike the original Baby, he only damages us and not himself. 

Accessories: One big development in accessories and special parts is the new "wetness sensor" in nappies. No more attempting to decipher if Baby2.0 has wee'd, his nappy has a yellow line that goes blue when wet! Excellent reassurance for anxious users. This is one of my favourite improvements since the previous model.

10/10 for snuggliness!


Overall we are pretty happy with our new addition but both very much looking forward to upgrading him to the crawling and laughing version later this year. 

*We were given our Baby2.0 for free from the manufacturer (Stork Inc.) but all views are our own.

18 comments:

  1. Hahaha very good! What a great way to explain a new baby :) Looking forward to more of these kind of reviews xo

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  2. Thanks Louise :) nice to write something funny after the birth stories which were a bit heavy!! x

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    1. Oh thanks! Kind of you to say :) xx

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  4. Hilarious! I laughed loads reading this and it reminded me of the early days with Fred. Precious times.

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    1. Thank you :) yeah "precious"... (By precious you mean exhausting and never ending right?!) :) x

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  5. So, so funny. Sprinkler system - too true!

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  6. This is brilliant! I like the downloading expressions bit - the first six weeks are pretty thankless without even a smile to say thanks for all the milk and chicken walking mummy!

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    1. So true! Most thanks you get is the odd 5 minutes of silence! (Generally interrupted by Toddler1.0's new speech function!)

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  7. Very useful review. Having upgraded my own model to School Child, it's nice to know there have been some improvements. Don't think I'll get one though, enjoying the new Able to Amuse Herself function on School Child too much!

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    1. Ooh I can't wait for that upgrade!! Sounds like heaven!

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  8. like this blog, not sure if i would have tested 2 almost prototypes so close together, but we now have" cracking teenager 15 &3/4 very limited edition" and " we wouldn't get another one as good again so its time to stop now & almost 8".....

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    1. Haha, yes, I think we'll wait for some new developments in the field before we try another prototype. In another decade we might get one with a mute button ;)

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  9. This made me laugh out loud! It's a great read for me especially since I'm about to receive my own Baby 2.0 - good to remember they don't do much except sleep, cry and feed!

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    1. Thank you :) good luck with your version! Xx

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  10. This is brilliant! Your Baby2.0 is roughly the same age as ours too!!

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