Since owning a toddler, the house has started to take on toddler characteristics! I have noted a few of the similarities below:
Turning the tv over is now just as tricky as getting the boy to put his shoes on.
Me: Let's put your shoes on!
Me: Which shoes are you going to wear?
Me: That wasn't a 'nope' question. Can you put your shoes on before this song finishes?
Him: Ooh look! A spade!
Me: Hm, I'm not sure... is it a wellies day or a "sunny day shoes" day?
Him: Oooh! Wellies on!
Me: menu button
Me: menu button. menu button. menu button.
Me: mute. mute. mute. menu button?
It: Channel 64?
Me: 220.127.116.11.7.4.4. Volume up. Mute. Mute. Menu button
It: Ooh menu!
It plays up at bedtime.
The microwave has a "just before bed" mischievous streak just like the toddler.
Me: Love you. Night night.
Him: Look! I can jump on my bed!
Me: Thanks for warming the milk. Night night.
It: Look! I can turn myself on and microwave the air!
It doesn't have full control of its water pipes.
Toddler: Wee's on floor when naked.
Kitchen tap: Leaks into the sink after it had been turned off.
The slightest change to routine throws it off course for days.
The toddler and shower will make you rue the day you did something slightly out of the norm!
Me: Let's have dinner in the garden before bed
Him: Yay! Different is cool!
Me: Ok. Now it's bedtime.
Him: WTF!?! I'm NEVER SLEEPING AGAIN!
Me: Let's have a cool shower today because it's hot.
It: Yay! Cool is cool
Me: Ok, let's get back to normal with a hot shower.
It: HELL NO! I shall boil and freeze you randomly for 3 days!