2. You've never visited the GP. If you're not sick enough for A&E, you're not sick.
3. The only reason she would take you to a GP is because you can't get antibiotics over the counter.
4. If you do need antibiotics she tells them which ones to prescribe, and knows which ones taste of pure evil.
5. When you fall and hurt yourself she barely blinks unless she hears bones crack.
6. If you bang your head REALLY hard she shines a torch in your eyes, asks you what you had for breakfast. If you answer correctly you are sent on your way.
7. Thermometers are for civilians. If you're really burning up she opens a window and gives you a drink.
8. You have never, ever had any sort of non pharmaceutical 'treatment' of any sort. Herbal schmerbal.
9. You do NOT want to get her started on amber teething necklaces.
10. Plasters are for playing, not for real cuts. If it's not bad enough to need gluing or stitching, it doesn't need a dressing.
11. People ask her to look at their children's rashes all the time. She says they're "probably viral" every time.
12. When you play doctors with your friends, they think doctors are the bosses and nurses do what they're told. But you know the truth.